Spinning Wheels

I've been thinking a lot lately about the methods I use to measure myself. Whether it's in my writing, my day job, or my relationships, I have an unwritten rubric against which I measure myself. Did I meet my word-goal for the day? Did I finish my to-do list? Did I accomplish everything asked of me at work? Did I spend enough time with my wife? Lately, it seems, the answer to most of these is no. I've been feeling like a car on an icy road-- the pedal is down and the motor is revving, but the wheels are just spinning against the slick. Any driver who lives in the snow knows that spinning out never helps the tires regain traction, in fact, it just makes the situation worse by solidifying the layer of ice between the car and the road. The best solution is to slow the tires and let the weight of the car bear down on the tires to give them what friction they can, then to use a rocking motion to get the car out from the icy rut.

So, what's this got to do with anything? Well, for me, it means I've got to slow myself down and get some friction between me and the things that are most important to me. I could spend endless days doing meaningless things-- there's always plenty of them-- or I could bear down on the few that actually matter.

Sounds good, right? But how to do it? That's what I want to focus on for next week. See you then.

What it takes

Wow, I'm coming off the tail end of a couple of really hard weeks. It's likely no one noticed this time around, but I hadn't realized I'd missed last week until I was already half way into the week. Yeah, I'm not thrilled to have missed one so soon after making my plans. Whenever I think of my favorite writing-blogs and how they manage to keep to their schedule, I have to realize that most of them write full-time (not that I'm suggesting that's easier, but it certainly is more focused). It's the aspiring writers who are in a difficult pinch, at least if like me, you're holding down a steady job, trying to write and blog as well, not to mention family. Yeah, it's a lot harder than I thought it would be going in. More than anything, I wish I could write full-time. That's the dream, after all. But I think it takes a set of particular somethings to get there.

It takes discipline and honing of one's life. It takes writing skill. It takes something worth saying. It takes days and days. It takes frustration. It takes a soul wrenching desire, such that it twists and ties up your innards to propel you forward. It takes practice. It takes time. Lots and lots of time. 

When I was younger, I wanted to be in professional sports. It was a young child's dream and didn't last long-- particularly when I learned what it would take to get there. I don't think writing professionally is any different. It takes just as much talent, skill, practice, and sheer determination to make it. 

I'm not so sure I've got all that yet, but I'm working at it. How about you?

Jameson